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In a Little Girl's MindThere sits the girl with the things in her eyes
Monsters, destruction, and sweet butterflies
Hopscotch and daisies, surrounded by screams
Beautiful dresses now torn at the seams
Crayons and paintbrushes, villains and grins
Young, gladsome innocence, hatred and sins
Little red houses on roads left to fade
Gorgeous moonlight shining off of the blade
Blood pouring out as she cries her own name
Knowing she's forced to take each bit of blame
She could have stopped it and left it behind
All of these things in her troubled young mind
She could have saved them if she dared to try
Rather, though, she left herself there to die.
Now, other
The Face At The DoorThe face at the door is a demon, a god
He smiles through stitches, his stare rather odd
The face at the door is a cruel, silent being
Yet, people are calm, and the children aren't fleeing
Quiet yourself, for you're the only one
Crying for help at the point of a gun
Learn how to fly, rather, learn how to fall,
The face at the door... well... there's no face at all.
So much time, so little to doI have seen the beauty of a dove beneath the skies
I have told the harshest truths, and I have told some lies
I have seen a child cry into its mother's arms
I have been that weeping girl who held onto self-harm

I have heard the laughter of a man about to die
I have seen the anger resting deep within their eyes
I have been the victim of my own disgusting thoughts
I have seen the best of people slowly start to rot

I have felt the heartache; I have seen a love go blue…
So much time is left to spare, but so much less to do…
DisappearWishing to disappear
never to existed in their mind
no reason to cheer
this is why I was designed
there's a cloud over me and its raining knives
all smiles are faked
no one hears his cry's
as he sits there shivers and shakes
doesn't even try to reach out because there's nothing there
only my own numb stare

no desire to fight the devils wrenches
would anyone notice if I could disappear
because Im starting to  feel warm in these trenches
would they even shed a tear?
Sick of the acting
let me compost with the dirt
live????..... ill think Ill be passing
lets make sure this hurts
still wishing to disappear
lets seal this coffin with a drop of b
I'm Fine"Are you okay?"
That's all they say.
And I leave behind
These words in my mind.
I'm broken, I'm dying.
Inside, I'm crying.
There are wounds beneath my skin.
There are trials I face within.
There are things I just can't say.
There are people I must betray.
Beneath a smile, I feel pain.
Behind the sun, there's always a little rain.
And beneath these words I hold in my head...
There's always the thing I say instead.
I leave the truth behind..
So when they say, "are you okay?"
I always say, "I'm fine."
Mind, oh MindSmiley face, smiley face, can't you ever see?
So much to be sad about, so much that could be
Going wrong for everyone, going wrong for you.
Smiley face, smiley face, don't you feel it too?

Sad face, sad face, can't you ever tell?
So much could be going great, going oh so well
Sad face, sad face, can't you ever see?
Life is spend much better when your thinking thoughts of glee.

Mind, oh mind, why can't you agree?
Thinking everything at once is slowly killing me...
AnorexiaMeet a girl named No One, with a heart of shattered stone
Staring at the other girl, the one that's not alone
Girl with skin that glistens, with the eyes of crystal seas
Grin of shining diamonds and a laugh like a disease
Flashes just a glance and soon, she's every trouble's cure
She has everything… and No One's off to be like her.

Eating turns into a crime, she'd rather be away
Thrusting fingers down her throat to make herself okay
Watching as her very bones are seen behind her flesh
There she drowns in tears, for she has not yet seen success.

Minutes turn to hours, and these hours turn to days
Every moment slipping, slowly fading
Words on the WallThe sun melted into the glamorous sky
The moon stood there, hidden by sweet lullabies.

But mommy was crying, her day had been hard
The tears in her eyes twinkled just like the stars.

Her face wasn't happy like it should have been
And though she was saddened, she forcefully grinned.

I wanted to see Mommy smile through it all...
I painted a picture on her bedroom walls.

I told her to look, just to come in and see
But Mommy was angry... she wasn't happy.

She threw me down hard on the cold wooden floor
Then picked me up, slamming my head on the door.

She yelled and she screamed, then she hit me once more
She slapped me till I couldn't see a
LabelsAttention seeker?
Maybe fighting for acception.
Emo?
Rather, suffering rejection...
Ugly?
Maybe breaking for direction...
Anorexic?
Perhaps dying for correction...
Fake?
Maybe hurting for affection..

So maybe before you label someone just because you don't feel a connection...
Maybe fix yourself before you point out imperfections.
What Happened?I used to think make up
Made people ugly.
Now I think I'm ugly without it.

I used to think people
Always loved me.
Now I think everyone hates me.

I used to think everybody
Was my best friend.
Now I think no one truly is.

I used to think
Boys were icky!
Now I wish I had one.

What happened to being
Happy?
Poor Man's GoldHush the youngest children, for the demon in the skies
Treasuring the very thought of anyone's demise
Glitter fades to black and shining moonlight fades to dust
Every cruel man's wonderland is built of poor man's trust
Tragic, empty melodies and blood beneath the air
Fearlessly escape the wind and drown without a care
Treasure death as platinum, as silver and as gold
Every cruel man's wonderland is built of poor man's gold...
RIP Unborn BabyTiny little body
Quiet little heartbeats.
See this little pea? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Little fingers start to grow
out of tiny little hands.
See this little peanut? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Your tiny legs start to grow
out of your sweet little body.
See this little pencil tip? That's how big your footprints are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

But, surprise!
"I'm pregnant."

Suddenly, tragedy.
Weak little heartbeat.
Weak little baby.
See these smiles on our faces? That's how loved you are right now.
But you don't know that yet.

Gone little he
I am Me. Who are You?I am thirteen years old.
I am not typical.
I am not average.
I am me.

I have been in two mental facilities.
Both times for thoughts of suicide.
I am not emo.
I am not a freak.
I am me.

My mother attempted suicide about six months ago.
My sister attempted suicide when i was eight.
But, I am not a victim.
I am not tortured.
I am me.

My father had a heart attack just over a week ago.
He was hospitalized for nine days.
He recently returned to the hospital for kidney problems.
I suffer from Bipolar Disorder with Psychotic Features.
I have hallucinations.
I have delusions.
But I am not a disorder.
I am not my difficulties.
I am not my troubles.
I am a labelI slid the blade across my wrist
Once
Twice
Again and again.

Maybe I’m an emotional freak.

I cause fights and arguments
Over
And over
Again.

Maybe I’m a troublemaker.

I use make up to make myself seem
Better
And…
Prettier.

Maybe I’m girly.

I complain about things
Even when sometimes
They’re not
That
Bad.

Maybe I’m an attention seeker.

I fall under so many
Stereotypes.

So maybe I am a label.

Or maybe
I’m just me.
CutsShe wants to cut the world away...
So she cuts her arm instead.
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More from ~MikkiMarie

RIP Unborn BabyTiny little body
Quiet little heartbeats.
See this little pea? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Little fingers start to grow
out of tiny little hands.
See this little peanut? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Your tiny legs start to grow
out of your sweet little body.
See this little pencil tip? That's how big your footprints are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

But, surprise!
"I'm pregnant."

Suddenly, tragedy.
Weak little heartbeat.
Weak little baby.
See these smiles on our faces? That's how loved you are right now.
But you don't know that yet.

Gone little he
Words on the WallThe sun melted into the glamorous sky
The moon stood there, hidden by sweet lullabies.

But mommy was crying, her day had been hard
The tears in her eyes twinkled just like the stars.

Her face wasn't happy like it should have been
And though she was saddened, she forcefully grinned.

I wanted to see Mommy smile through it all...
I painted a picture on her bedroom walls.

I told her to look, just to come in and see
But Mommy was angry... she wasn't happy.

She threw me down hard on the cold wooden floor
Then picked me up, slamming my head on the door.

She yelled and she screamed, then she hit me once more
She slapped me till I couldn't see a
The Face At The DoorThe face at the door is a demon, a god
He smiles through stitches, his stare rather odd
The face at the door is a cruel, silent being
Yet, people are calm, and the children aren't fleeing
Quiet yourself, for you're the only one
Crying for help at the point of a gun
Learn how to fly, rather, learn how to fall,
The face at the door... well... there's no face at all.
Good Enough... for YOU.As I sit here cradling the blade in my hands
Treasuring the moments I wish that I had
I can't stop growing more lost and confused
I can't stop thinking... am I good enough for you?

As I sit here, wrapping the rope around my neck
No one will understand a meaning so complex
I simply can't stop thinking about it somehow
Thinking, am I good enough for you now?

As I sit here, pulling the trigger on the gun
I think, maybe I was never meant for "the one"...
And ...
Bam
goes the bullet.
For when I think it through...
I really won't ever be good enough for you.
Mind, oh MindSmiley face, smiley face, can't you ever see?
So much to be sad about, so much that could be
Going wrong for everyone, going wrong for you.
Smiley face, smiley face, don't you feel it too?

Sad face, sad face, can't you ever tell?
So much could be going great, going oh so well
Sad face, sad face, can't you ever see?
Life is spend much better when your thinking thoughts of glee.

Mind, oh mind, why can't you agree?
Thinking everything at once is slowly killing me...

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Canvas

:iconmikkimarie:

Let her paint a masterpiece,
Let her paint a lie
Let her paint a word inside the shining silver skies.

Let her paint a mystery,
Let her paint a sin
Let her paint the things that lie in darkness deep within.

Let her paint a masterpiece
(but this time there's a twist)
Make the brush a blade and let the canvas be her wrist...
:iconmikkimarie:
<3 thanks to :iconbreathinbreathout: for the idea :)
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:iconanimeluvr999721:
~animeluvr999721 Apr 14, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
T_T this is amazing!
Reply
:iconmikkimarie:
~MikkiMarie Apr 14, 2013
Thank you!!
Reply
:iconanimeluvr999721:
~animeluvr999721 Apr 15, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
you're very welcome!
Reply
:iconblackrosevale:
Mood: Wow! !BlackRoseVale Apr 10, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is amazing! XO And now I'm going to press the watch button! XD
Reply
:iconmikkimarie:
~MikkiMarie Apr 10, 2013
Hahahah! :) Thanks!!
Reply
:iconbhsbluehairedsaiyan:
Mood: Love ~BHSBlueHairedSaiyan Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
TT^TT I'm going to draw something inspired by this TT^TT So BEAUTIFUL!!
Reply
:iconmikkimarie:
~MikkiMarie Feb 25, 2013
O: YAY! :D
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconbhsbluehairedsaiyan:
~BHSBlueHairedSaiyan Feb 26, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hahaha, thank YOU darling~
Reply
:iconm4k31t83tt3r:
Mood: Wow! ~M4K31T83TT3R Feb 22, 2013  Student Writer
This is genius. I love the ending line.
Reply
:iconmikkimarie:
~MikkiMarie Feb 22, 2013
My friend came up with it :)
Reply
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