[x]

BullyShh.
Shut up.
Don't
Say
Anything.

Run.
Faster.
Faster.
Faster.
Stop.

Scream.

Fear.

Die.

Demons in the shadows
Twisting
Turning
Staring.
Watch yourself
Bleeding.

Quiet now.
Hush, child.
They'll find a way
To get you.

Beatings, swallowing you.
Scars, defining you.
You.
Breaking.
Crying.
Dying.

After all
You know you're weak.

You can't fight a bully
When the bully's inside of you.

SchizophreniaSmile.
Laugh.
Run
Faster.
Faster.
Stop.

"What are you doing?"
Trying to escape.
"Nothing."

Look behind you.
Are they there?
Shh.

Shut up.

Don't.
Say.
Anything.

"What's wrong?"
You'll never understand it.
"Never mind."

Scream.
Scream louder.
Rip your hair out.
Cover your ears.

"Calm down."
I can't.
"I'm sorry."

They want you to die.
They're out for you.
Shut the door.
Lock it.
Unlock it.
Lock it again.
Hide.
Shh.

"Are you okay?"
I'm dying.
"I'm fine."

You'll never make it.
Freeze.
Fall to the ground.
Cry.
Cry harder.

Stop.

"What are you doing?"
Dying.
"What are you going through?"
Torture.
"What'

Bipolar DisorderLook over your shoulder. They're watching you.
Tighten your stomach muscles.
Bounce your leg up and down.
Faster.
Faster.
"Are you okay?"
No.
"I'm fine."

Shut up.
Don't say anything.
Feel it, feel the thoughts melting from your mind.
Freeze.
Stare.
Laugh.
"What are you doing?"
Dying.
"Nothing."

They're behind you.
Kill them before they kill you.
"What's wrong?"
Please save me.
"Nothing."

Crazy. You're crazy.
No one wants you.
Pull the trigger.
Do it.

"Please tell me what's wrong."
You wouldn't understand.
"Nothing."

Laugh.

Smile.

Scream.

"Who are you? I don't know you anymore."
I'm a nobody.
I am Bipolar Dis

Nobody Told MeNobody told me,
How to act.
I wish I knew how much was too much,
or when too little was not enough.
If somebody told me,
that the small things meant the most,
and the big things were forgettable;
Where would I be today?

Nobody told me,
Who to love.
What came of the people I knew
and who were the people I would have known?
If somebody told me,
that I HAD the perfect person,
or that I am with the wrong one;
Would I be able to live with myself?

Nobody told me,
How to feel.
Is what I am feeling right or wrong,
and which should I act upon?
If somebody told me,
that I was being overly obsessive,
or that I should have let go:

I Am SchizophreniaShh.
Don't tell.
Shut up.

Sit there.
And don't
Say
Anything.

"Are you okay?"
No.
"I'm fine."

Turn off the light.
On again.
Off.
"What are you doing?"
Breaking.
Dying.
"Nothing."

Stare.
You can't fight the shadows.
They'll kill you if you tell.
Shut up.

Scream.

Rip your hair out.

Cover your eyes.
Uncover them.
Cover them again.

Lock the door.
But look
Now you're trapped.
Unlock it.
Lock it again.

"What's wrong?"
Everything.
"Nothing."

Don't take the medication.
It's poison.
Don't drink the water.
Don't eat your dinner.
Don't sleep.

You
Won't
Survive.

"I don't know you anymore. Who have you become?"
I

CancerFeel the pain aching through your bones
Your flesh, seemingly fading to dust
Your mind, burning
Your thoughts, racing.
Dying.
Breaking.

"It'll be okay."
No it won't.
"I know."

Fight the tears, your father can't see you cry.
After all
You're a fighter.
Right?

"You can do this."
No, I can't.
"Thank you."

Breathe.
Slower.
Slower.
No.
Faster.
Stop.

Shut up.

You
Can't
Win.

After all
You don't have cancer.

Cancer
Is who you are.

Losing a FriendDreams, no.
Nightmares.
Spinning, spiraling, chasing you everywhere you go
"It had to happen."
No, it didn't.
"I know."

Turn off the light.
On again.
Off.
Stop breathing, it's not worth it.
Play a sad song in your head
Faster
Faster
Stop.
"Are you okay?"
No.
"I'm fine."

I miss you.
I miss your voice
Your eyes
Your smile.
"I'm sorry."
How could you be?
"It's not your fault."

Cry.
Slowly, let it poison you
Let it sink into your mind
The pain
The sorrow
The hate.

"You'll get better."
No I won't.
"It was meant to happen."
No it wasn't.
"He's gone."
No.. he's not.

... "I know."

CanvasLet her paint a masterpiece,
Let her paint a lie
Let her paint a word inside the shining silver skies.

Let her paint a mystery,
Let her paint a sin
Let her paint the things that lie in darkness deep within.

Let her paint a masterpiece
(but this time there's a twist)
Make the brush a blade and let the canvas be her wrist...

Words on the WallThe sun melted into the glamorous sky
The moon stood there, hidden by sweet lullabies.

But mommy was crying, her day had been hard
The tears in her eyes twinkled just like the stars.

Her face wasn't happy like it should have been
And though she was saddened, she forcefully grinned.

I wanted to see Mommy smile through it all...
I painted a picture on her bedroom walls.

I told her to look, just to come in and see
But Mommy was angry... she wasn't happy.

She threw me down hard on the cold wooden floor
Then picked me up, slamming my head on the door.

She yelled and she screamed, then she hit me once more
She slapped me till I couldn't see a

I Love You, DaddyDaddy, please don't touch me.
It doesn't feel good.
It makes me feel..
Naughty.

Daddy, please don't hit me.
I didn't mean to disappoint you.
When you hit me, it makes me feel...
Bad.

Daddy, please don't hurt her.
Mommy didn't do anything.
When you hit her, it makes me feel..
Mad.

Daddy, please don't say you love me.
I know you're lying.
When you say you still want me, it makes me feel...
Sad.

Daddy, please stop screaming at her.
You already killed her.
When you scream at her, it makes me feel..
Angry.

Daddy, stay there.
Let me sink the knife into your throat.
When you bleed, it makes me feel..
Alive.

Daddy, aren't you happy now?
As you

Falling ButterfliesThere lies a girl in a forest so dead
With a thought, just a thought, living inside her head
A thought of a world with no furious knights
A world with a dream in the darkest of nights

There lies a girl with a thought in her mind
Something the others simply left behind
A thought of a world of imagination
Where everyone lives in their own creations

A girl living in an imaginary place
With fire in the rain and a smile on her face
There lies a girl with a new point of view...
There lies a girl looking up towards you

There lies a girl, with a knife in her flesh
Life was not a place filled with happiness
What was the point of survivin

With YouHold me tight,
Please don't go.
I'm falling apart,
falling down so low.

Like a rag doll I'm tearing,
seams falling apart.
I can't sew them back up,
wouldn't know where to start.

I need your help,
but I'm too scared to say,
too scared to reach out,
tell you to stay.

You're my only hope,
like it or not.
My chances are slim,
but I'll give it a shot.

So hold me up,
don't let me fall,
just tell me it's okay,
answer my call.

That's all you need to do,
and I'll be alright.
With you by my side,
I'll stand up and fight.

The MonsterI can't trust;
I can't love you.
The monster,
It's overpowering.
I'm not strong enough;
It has invaded me.
Every organ,
Every cell,
Every molecule,
Has been destroyed,
And taken over by something that isn't human.

It has to be something else;
It has to.
I wouldn't cut myself.
I wouldn't hate myself,
Or starve myself,
Or lose myself in a sea of hatred,
Of bloodlust,
And sorrow.
Would I?

The Abdication of the ThroneCalling my name,
Screaming for me to run towards you.
But I can't,
I won't,
What should I do?

I want to run,
But is it right?
Should I stay?
Should I fight?

All my dreams,
My childish fears,
They live in my mind,
And escape through my tears.

I can't hold on,
I just want to fall.
I want run,
And escape over the wall.

I'm gonna let go;
I'm gonna fall down.
I have lost hope,
And deserted my crown.

BulimiaThrust your fingers down your throat.
You're ugly.
Fat.
Disgusting.
Horrible.
Wrong.

You're hideous.
No one wants you.
You're a horrible mess, a disaster set before them.
Make yourself thinner.
Make
Yourself
Beautiful.

The models on magazine covers
Thin
Strong
Wonderful.
Why can't you be like them?
Instead you're an ugly, horrifying, sickening mess.

Make yourself pretty.
Make yourself perfect.
Thin.
Skinny.

Make
Yourself
Beautiful.

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Holding HandsA child interlocking fingers with
His mother...
As his father lies
In a casket
Of roses and sweet memories.

Children high five and
Hold hands to
Dance, and
Spin.

Hands, used to hold flowers and
To give a gift to those in need.
Used to
Brush the hair out of her face
Before the kiss.

As he asks for her hand in marriage
she smiles
And allows him to place a shining ring
On her finger.

Hands.
Used to hug one another
only leading
To falling
In love.

Fingers.
Used to tickle a piano
with a soothing melody
or to type a letter of sorrow
As we use our hands to
Slide the knife
Across our throat.

And with the future

BreathA poison in the words of a soldier
Of a monster, of a child, of a man about to die.
Something a child remembers in its mother
Something more powerful than a heartbeat
Because a heartbeat
Can be stopped
By a
Breath.

Yes.
Breath.
Forming words of hate and love
Of sorrow, happiness, regret
Anger.
Beauty.

Breath.
A venom in the lungs of a suffering young girl
Yet a treasure in the eyes
Of a man
About to die.

Yes.
This is life.
This is sorrow.
This is pain.
This...
Is breath.

I'm Fine‎"Are you okay?"
No. I'm dying. I have to push myself to wake up in the morning, and when I finally do, I want to go back to sleep. Even my best dreams are becoming nightmares. I can't taste food, I can't stand the things I used to love. I'm breaking. I'm fading. I'm dying.
"I'm fine."

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Submitted: December 30, 2012
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[x]

I am not a stereotype

by ~MikkiMarie, Dec 30, 2012, 7:17:51 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Slide the blade across your wrist.
Again.
Again.
Again.
Stop.
"Doesn't it hurt?"
I can't feel anything.
"A little."

Punch your own stomach.
Harder.
Harder.
Does it hurt yet?
Yes.
Keep going.
"Why do you do that?"
The pain makes me feel alive.
"I don't know."

Stare.
Cry.
Scream.
Stop.
Keep staring.
"What's wrong with you?"
I'm dead inside.
"Nothing."

"Emotional freak."
I'm just depressed.
"Sorry."

Stare at your arms.
Your stomach.
Your waist.
Your thighs.
"What are you doing?"
I'm ugly.
"Never mind."

"Attention seeker."
I just have low self esteem.
"I'm sorry."

Cuts.
Scars.
Tears.
Emotions.

"Emo."
"Scene girl."
"Psycho."

I'm just human.

I'm just me.

I am not a stereotypeby ~MikkiMarie

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I dunno. Wrote it really fast. O_O
comments?

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~Honeysaber Feb 23, 2013 Student Traditional Artist

its not very good

~MikkiMarie Feb 23, 2013

thats okay

~EeveeTree Feb 2, 2013

Oh gosh, the "Attention Seeker". Whenever I hear/see someone say that, I get so mad.

Self-hurt, in my opinion, is a lot like drugs/alcoholism. It becomes an addiction. It becomes the only way to "calm down" or "feel better". And unless you've been in that situation, you just can't really understand what it's like.

~LadyXaim Feb 23, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

I kind of disagree with that *please dont get mad!!* only the not being in the situation part. I haven't been but I've talked to enough people who have to understand. And I've been in a situation where I thought about it a lot and considered it. So, though I've never done it, I understand.

Also, amazing poem, you've really captured the way most people respond to the things that people say. Bang up job

~EeveeTree Feb 25, 2013

That's good that you can understand

I guess there are people that can... just most of the people I know who haven't ever harmed themselves scorn those who have and don't seem to understand it at all.

~LadyXaim Feb 27, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Yeah, i know those people too :/ its a shame but you know how people can be

~MikkiMarie Feb 2, 2013

Indeed O_O thank you!

~RenosGirl77 Feb 2, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Damn those stereotypical bastards. They say stuff like that because they're ignorant. There is no shame in being yourself, because being like that's the only way you will ever find people like you. Don't give up!!

~MikkiMarie Feb 2, 2013

Aw thank you <3

~RenosGirl77 Feb 3, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

No problem at all - I only speak the truth.

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I am not a stereotype

I am not a stereotypeby ~MikkiMarie

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