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Submitted on
March 7, 2013
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Tiny little body
Quiet little heartbeats.
See this little pea? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Little fingers start to grow
out of tiny little hands.
See this little peanut? That's how big you are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

Your tiny legs start to grow
out of your sweet little body.
See this little pencil tip? That's how big your footprints are right now.
But Mommy doesn't know that yet.

But, surprise!
"I'm pregnant."

Suddenly, tragedy.
Weak little heartbeat.
Weak little baby.
See these smiles on our faces? That's how loved you are right now.
But you don't know that yet.

Gone little heartbeat.
Gone little baby.
See us walking into the doctor's office? That's how excited we are right now.
But you don't know that yet.

And, surprise.
"I'm so sorry for your loss."

Sad Mommy.
Lost baby.
See these tears on our faces? That's how much we love you right now.
But you don't know that yet.

Miscarriage.
Tiny baby.
Lost baby.
A baby that had Daddy's eyes and Mommy's smile.
A baby that only wanted to say
I
Love
You.
A baby that gave the best little hugs.
The sweetest little smiles.
The greatest little giggles.
But, surprise.

Mommy doesn't know that yet.
Yes, my mother went in for an ultrasound today. Sadly they found no heartbeat, and she is expected to have a miscarriage... the day after tomorrow.
Comments? Critiques? I appreciate all. <3
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:iconthelooneychick:
Firstly, I must admit that I completely sympathize with this; a few years ago, a dear friend of mine had a miscarriage on what was supposed to be the day of her baby shower. This poem illustrates the stunning grief of a lost baby in the most gorgeously heartbreaking way.
But emotional prejudice aside, the use of perspective here is smart and seamless, in a way that makes it play out almost like some horrific fairy tale or bedtime story. But the real impact comes from the way the words are written, rather than the words themselves, which I find quite ingenious, especially the phrase, "I love you". It's beautifully agonizing!
Best regards to you and your family. I feel inclined to offer you my simple heartfelt advice; stay close to each other, and know that brighter days will come again, in spite of the grief you feel now.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
20 out of 21 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconalexyorim:
The poem is so heartbreakingly magnificent. The asymmetric expressions of every sad heartbeat, every despair and every tear goes with every every line, every stanza and every word. The expressions of unexpected surprises mixed with unfulfilled hope and grief of an unborn baby, who can never see the world for the first time, and cut short before going out of a mother's womb, and never feeling love after birth, whether it's abortion, miscarriage or disasters, touched me and possibly everyone else's. A great poem like that deserves to be shared and spoken in the memory of all unborn children all over the world.

Keep writing and move on.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
12 out of 12 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconbookwriter1998:
bookwriter1998 Dec 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I cried. Now all I can think of is the one I lost.......
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:iconkillerlord123:
It's really sad. A full great life that child had ahead. But death did his job too soon.
Reply
:icongabjas:
Gabjas Aug 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I am so sorry to hear that. On a brighter side of hings, this poem was amazing... as always. :) Thank you for bringing this talented piece of art into the world.
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:iconziuziu12:
ziuziu12 Jun 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I had a twin that died before they even HAD a heartbeat.
I still wonder what he or she would be like.
I still think maybe he or she would make my life happier.
Reply
:icont-j-a-y-e:
T-J-A-Y-E Jun 27, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That was so sad :(
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:iconkenntara833:
kenntara833 Jun 11, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I am so sorry for the loss of your unborn baby brother or sister. You are in my prayers.
Reply
:iconsneeuwmaan:
Sneeuwmaan Jun 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
so beautiful... my aunt actually had the same a year ago... and so had my grandma. she died while giving birth, and the baby was dead. the graves of my grandma and my aunt or uncle are the same. i was just not born yet, and my mum fearde to give birth to me cuz she thought it would happen to her as well.
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:iconcaro-kitty:
Caro-Kitty May 9, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
My mother had two miscarriages so this touch me in a special way. Beautifully written.
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:iconmikkimarie:
MikkiMarie May 10, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm so sorry :(
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:iconcaro-kitty:
Caro-Kitty May 10, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Its okay. It affected her more than me and my sister (we were under 10). My brother was born right after that. I guess that's the silver lining in that situation.
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