To me, it’s called inhaling poison,
Which drenches my lungs and sinks into my bones
And melts into my mind.
To some people, it’s called anxiety.
To me, it’s called an unbearable shakiness in my soul
The nervousness preventing my from ever escaping
This disease in my heart.
To some people, it’s called living.
To me, it’s called never being able to run away.
Never being able to truly go, truly leave.
To me, it’s called being caught in a nightmare,
While struggling to dream.
Chasing a mystery with no solution.
Escaping your own sanity to reach more sanity,
Freeing yourself from your happiness to find more happiness.
To some people, it’s called life.
There’s no such thing.
But yeah. comments?
And you're not pleased with this? How can that be?
Personally, I find this to be very true and beautiful.
Blessed be, dear.
I understand the concept and I think it's pretty good, but the structure is too loose and in the end it crumbles completely. When it suddenly comes to "living" it feels.. yeah, a bit sudden xD It would've looked better if you described some more elements like you did with the first two parts before you came to the "living" part (which should've been one for itself also).
Raging scene kids in 5...4...3...
^This guy. I like this guy.
And debaterarcherwriter, I know what free verse is, I don't have mad respect for free verse but it even for free verse this kind of stuff just doesn't tickle my fancy. The whole, "ugh my life in a first world country is so sad and terrible and you guys have no idea what I've been through unnghh," mostly, which this falls under. And I wasn't targeting this in particular. I was in the "What's Hot" section looking for something to be pissed about. I was successful on numerous counts without even having to click the "Show More" button.
Good day to you both, I'm off to oversee a lemon plantation.
To me, it's the reason we need the Redeemer.
Great job on the poem!